Flirting with your crush is nerve-wracking enough (why do you always feel like you’re at a loss for words??) but flirting over text welcomes a whole new dilemma. You can’t rely on small and subtle flirtations like making eye contact, smiling, or gently touching their arm when they make you laugh. Instead, you have to come up with cute and witty responses (gulp) to show your crush how you really feel via good morning texts and strategically-placed emojis.
It’s totally normal to feel a little awkward (and the worry of being left on read is real), but tbh, knowing how to flirt over text is pretty straightforward. Ask questions, sprinkle in some cute compliments here and there, and yes, don’t underestimate the power of a heart-eyes emoji. After all, you’re just having a fun and lighthearted conversation. Who knows, maybe your flirty texts will turn into a conversation on the phone or IRL, and before you know it, you’ll be planning your first date. All you need to do is press “send.” Follow the tips below on how to flirt over text and your crush will respond in no time.
Don’t settle for “hey”
Start the conversation with a strong opener. “Hey” or “hi” might seem like the obvious options, but you want to make a good impression. Spice it up a little and get a debate going (Dunkin’ or Starbucks? Taco Bell or Chipotle?). Ask for a new Netflix recommendation, send a funny TikTok, or let them know you’re excited to see them at the party this weekend. The conversation can go so many places from there.
Ask questions
Asking fun and thoughtful questions shows that you care and are interested in what’s going on in their life. It could be as straightforward as “how are you?” but feel free to chat about summer break plans, what they’re currently reading, or if they’re also on the foodie side of TikTok. It’s such a simple yet effective way to start a conversation.
Show off your sense of humor
Share a hilarious TikTok, meme, or story about your day. Laughing with someone instantly makes you feel closer, and it establishes a playful, flirty dynamic in your conversation. In fact, a 2015 study from the Journal of International Association for Relationship Research found that shared laughter strengthens a bond, so get giggling.
Compliment them
Make them smile with a sweet compliment, whether it be about their new shoes, their game-winning point in tonight’s basketball game, or the grade they scored on a recent exam. They’ll absolutely feel all warm and fuzzy inside.
Use emojis
A flirty emoji can add a little oomph to any text. Giving them a sweet compliment? Add a 😍. Teasing them a little? Don’t forget a 🤪. Sending a good morning or good night text? A 😘 is an absolute must.
Avoid the triple text
Yes it’s tempting, but multiple texts might come off a bit too strong. Sure, double or triple texts might be okay if that’s the way the conversation is going. But if you’re exchanging messages every few minutes and they’re taking a bit longer to respond, try to avoid a follow-up text. It’s disappointing when someone leaves you on read, but there could be so many reasons why — they’re in class, had to leave for work, or maybe even fell asleep. Give it some time.
Don’t ghost
If you’re in the middle of a really good conversation but also really need to get to work or practice, let them know. Don’t leave your crush hanging for hours — that might send the wrong message and lead them to believe that you’re not really into them. Instead, shoot your crush a text and let them know you have to get going, but you’d love to continue the conversation later. It’s not always necessary (if say, you’re just going to run an errand for 30 minutes), but it’s a nice gesture.
Leah Campano is an Associate Editor at Seventeen, where she covers pop culture, entertainment news, health, and politics. On the weekends, you can probably find her watching marathons of vintage Real Housewives episodes or searching for New York City’s best almond croissants.
